Is it Okay to be Depressed?

Argh. Nothing seems to turn out fine, much less the way i want it. Failures, streaks of bad choices and being at the brunt of consequences. Gosh, if i can fast forward time, i'd do it now.

With that said, i think it's perfectly fine to be depressed but not too long. I think a better question would've been, what kinda sorrows am i down with?

Sigh. Pathetic isn't it, to find yourself not as insurmountable as you thought. But at the end of the day, all things still work for the good for those who love Him ain't it?

i hope i'm not saying that as a consolation.

Whatever You're Doing.

We are like pieces of a jig saw puzzle, but the problem with all of us is that we are all in odd shapes and sizes, never fitting into God's big picture. Changes have to be made, sides trimmed, edges smoothened so that we could be a part of His plan. Yea, it's painful but give it more thought and you'll find that the truth really is that, there is nothing more fulfilling, more wonderful, more exciting, more accomplishing, more delightful and more worthwhile than being at the centre of God's will.

Oh, if only i could be less short-sighted and more patient in the hands of the Master Craftsman.

Jesus in Japan.

I thought this was really cool so i guess i'll share it to whosever reading. :]

5 Languages of Love.

LOL. i never thought i'd pick up this book, till my friend bored me enough to go get something to read while he studied at Starbucks. It's quite a steal actually; costs me only 12 bucks. Nevertheless i'd really like to say that it's a great book, really enlightening and rational, a treat for my logic craving mind. I'd recommend this one to everyone out there, do check it out!

Ahh, oh yes. I've put some of the pointers to action, really trying hard to find out what my parents' love languages are. Money's on "Acts of Service" (for those who've read.), they're always nagging me to do housework and so i did (well at least a little)! And i think it kinda worked a bit, my mom actually gave me the i-dont-want-to-say-it-but-thank-you smile which really perked me up during these rather saddening times. I guess i'm more of the words of affirmation person? Or maybe not. i've no idea, and i dont really care either.

Yea, i think this is really gonna be fun.

Sighhh.

I'm plagued with a heart wrenching reminder of how incredulously stupid i am for asking that question. ):

but with every choice comes a consequence, so here i am paying the price.

and pain is indeed a good teacher though a really cruel one.

Grace.

"Change starts when by the grace of God, you finally realize how filthy and desperately helpless you are. And change can only continue on the basis of God's grace, without which, all discipline equates to mere human effort."

P.S: I'm off the grid. I've de-activated my facebook for this period of time.

Change.

The truth is, i lost myself in the midst of all the chaos.

The life, the environment in camp just dont shape me into a better person, and if we dont get better, we could only get worst. I got ugly.

The ups, the downs in my walk with God proves to be detrimental to my spiritual health, if our souls aren't healthy, we start to decay. I crave consistency.

The emotions, the thoughts in my heart and mind are just too messed up, and if we make a mess of ourselves, we could only hurt others. I lost a friend.

If only i could realize all these sooner then so many unpleasant experiences wouldn't have happened. I need (to) change.

Because You're the only Constant in my Life.

Oh yes, His love endures.

NEW SHOES.

HAHAHAHAHA. Okay time to burn the streets!

Edit:

Okay, i just finished my run (maybe bout 5km?) in my little red ridding shoes and i just wanna say; it's awesome. BUT i still hate the feeling of panting-like-mad, kinda makes me feel like i'm on the brink of dying. Hurr.

So anyway, i went a little different (or should i say crazy?) with this run, smiling at random people, going BEEP-BEEP(!) before short sprints and more importantly, tried out various styles of running. Gonna stick to mid to front foot strides.

It's fun. I'm trying to like running which also means trying to get used to feeling of near-death.

And in the midst of all this, i find myself thinking bout you. Weird isn't it?

On Turning 22 Soon.

"Men are like wine - some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age." - Pope John XXIII